through my Father's eyes

sometimes she catches me off guard.

sometimes i can't take my eyes off of her.

my grandma took these pics last friday night when jaeda stayed the night at her house for the first time. i gasped when i first saw them. she is beautiful. and i don't even care if she gets a big head for her ol' mom telling her that too much. i think a little girl of any age cannot be told enough!i've never heard of a girl having too much self esteem!

these still shots of my little living epistle took my breath away. and eric can laugh all he wants at how darn long it takes me to look--no examine--one picture, because i don't even care!!! i couldn't help but look at these frozen moments again and again and again and again...each time seeing a new--gorgeous and overlooked--way, that my girl is made like no other. each time savoring the treasure of a person that has been given to me to love.

despite the fact that today was a rough "listening day", despite the fact that she is bossy and messy and soooo four years old, there is nothing more beautiful to me than her big blue eyes...oh, and when she smiles!!! her many four year old faults don't even come into my head when i see her face.

if my love for j is supposed to be a picture of my Father's love for me than i can't help but wonder how many times He pours over my image in a day. if i could only see the way He loves me...the beauty that He sees every time He looks at me...maybe i could hold my head up higher and live a life of praise instead of walking through life with my head hanging--like my every move is an apology for being "me".

if i could only see me the way that He sees me. it would change everything...
maybe i could finally trust Him enough to fully love Him back...